The question about whether you want your elderly mother to move in with you because she needs someone caring for her, or whether you should hire someone to be with her at her home instead can be tough for some family members. You want the best for your loved ones and while you realize that your mother needs some level of care, even live in care for seniors, you just don’t know about having her move in with you.
Some families default to the common thinking that they will have their loved one move in with them because it will be easier, that they will know their loved one is cared for properly, and safe. But they don’t think long enough about it and end up in a situation that is uncomfortable for both of them.
Believe it or not, your mother might not even want to move in with you. There was a study that highlighted the fact that more adult children were willing to have their elderly parent live with them when they needed support (51 percent) than their parents wanting to live with their children when they reached that point in their lives (32 percent).
The fact is that parents don’t generally want to move in with their children. It might have been standard thinking generations ago when we had more nuclear families, when everyone lived in the same house or in close proximity. That’s not the case anymore, so moving in with adult children will mean a more significant change in their life.
If you are concerned about your elderly loved one’s health and well-being, and if you feel that they need some level of care around the clock, you might want to consider talking to them about hiring a live in caregiver.
It’s important that you speak to your elderly loved one first. This is not a decision that you should be making for your mother, but rather one that she should make for herself. You might be helping her when you can, devoting yourself to her care, but she deserves the respect of making the decision about what type of care she should have.
Hiring a live in caregiver can provide a great deal of support for your mother, so when she has trouble bathing, cooking, light cleaning, doing the laundry, or other basic necessities, it may be time to consider live in care for seniors. Your mother might not be as comfortable as you would be having her move in with you.
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